Today would have been Maya Angelou’s 90th birthday… and as always she brings the wisdom and truth. Thanks Maya… your words resonate every day.
The hard part is knowing who to choose and knowing yourself well enough to choose wisely. Sustainment not exhilaration. The thing that lasts.
So you know how sometimes you think you know exactly what your happy should look like? You think that your bliss has to be x and y and z or it’s not really bliss? You are sure that your “perfect” is something that looks like this or that or it’s not your perfect?
Yeah? You know?
Nope… you don’t. Continue reading
So here we are, it’s 2018, everything is the same and yet nothing will ever be the same again.
Life changed a lot at the end of 2017, but 2018 is looking like a real year of change for me, for us, and I’m ready. I’ve cried, I’ve yelled, I’ve gotten tougher than I ever thought I would be, and I’ve taken charge of my life and started moving forward in a big way.
This is my life.
I read this meme the other day that said “Sometimes the best light comes from a burning bridge.” and I literally laughed until I cried. I’ve burned a few of those. I’ve marched some people off of my bridge at rifle point. I’ve closed some books. Swiped left on people who desperately needed a much more harsh rejection. And still I persist.
I am alive.
So I’m embracing the new. Figuring out the unknown. Finding my big words and telling my story. I’m still happy. Despite the changes… or maybe because of them… and I’m still me.
Let’s do this. Let’s live. Let’s be.
So yeah, it’s Thanksgiving… and even though it might be the oddest Thanksgiving in years I’ve already been celebrating the thankfulness this week and I intend to continue doing exactly that every day. Thankful shouldn’t be something we only try on once a year you see… no matter how hard things are, no matter how wrong things have gone, no matter what’s happening… there is always always always something to be thankful for.
Always. Continue reading
You know, one of the most interesting things I’m seeing in myself these days is a lot of reprioritization. Continue reading
Oh hell… if that was a question and the answer included my name at all then the quick answer is probably not and the reality is definitely not. Adulting is something I struggle with actually, even at my advanced age. Even with all of the accoutrements of adulthood wrapped around me and draped from me. I still struggle daily to not to end up in a blanket fort, coloring, and playing on my phone.
I am the oldest 13 year old you know.
But these days I’m starting to see some alarming signs of adulting slipping into my routine. And I am afraid. Very afraid. Because I’m still not entirely sure that I’m ready to be a grown up. An adult. In charge. But apparently I am.
Who saw that shit coming? Right?
But yeah, every time I get the trash to the curb the night before the garbage men come, every time I wash/dry/fold/put away my laundry all in the same day, every time I clean the entire house in 3 hours, every morning when I make my bed and put away all of my shoes and jewelry, and every time I check my budget and pay all of the bills on time I realize I have become something I have never been before.
A real grownup woman.
And again I get scared. Very scared. Because I don’t really want to grow up. I never really did. Growing up means you get closer to dying and my plan is to live forever. Even if I’m living forever in my blanket fort, watching “Stranger Things”, and coloring on my Starbucks cups. Even if I’m keeping my seat at the kids table, pretending I can’t hear the adults talking, and grumbling about eating all of my vegetables even if these days I’m actually liking them.
I always was a weird kid. #nothingchanges
But despite my fears and despite my reluctance, I’m approaching adulthood whether I like it or not. And I’m figuring out that I’m pretty good at it. Even if I’m not sure how to do all of the parts of it yet. I’m trying. I’m figuring out that I’m stronger than I thought. I’m figuring out that I can do this.
So watch out y’all… I’m growing up. Not all at once… because I still haven’t figured out when the second garbage day is each week. But I’m getting a lot better at this. I might turn 21 some year soon… and then?
Get out of my way! #livingmylife #nolimits